Are you ready, baby? It's the Dick n' Bush Unrepentant to the Mutha Fuckin' End Tour! Inspired by 43rd President of the United States George W. Bush and the Dark Lord of the Sith himself, Vice President Dick Cheney and their sudden need to jump in front of the cameras and "get the record straight!" The Bush Era may be over, but the hits can last forever!
They've been on every network giving the good news that we won (Everything!) and nothing that bad really happened. A mixtape for those who were living in caves during 9-11, the war in Afghanistan, the war in Iraq, Hurricane Kartina, Hurricane Rita, Hurricane Ike, the subprime mortgage crisis, the overall collapse of the banks, the rise of Iran, $4 gasoline, the tanking economy, Guantanamo Bay, illegal foreign renditions, Valerie Plame, Homeland Security, duct tape, the US attorney firing scandal, Anthrax, the collapse of our infrastructure, the violence in Gaza, tainted toys, rising medical costs and pick-a-tragedy, any tragedy!
Twenty-one slamming, unforgiving, borderline annoying, in your face, "it's all yo' fault not mine and I APOLOGIZE FOR NOTHING!" tracks. From Bush telling you to "Hate Me Now!" to hollering "Party Like A Rock Star" at the White House with all your cronies and military contractors while it was nothing but "Bombs Over Baghdad" and "Welcome to the Jungle" for our troops.
While you on a roof waiting for help when the levees breached or dying out in front of Superdome, George and Condi were singing Scorpion, promising that as soon as she was done shoe shopping they would, in fact, rock New Orleans like a hurricane! And remember that last press conference where Bush basically sang the Sex Pistol's cover of "My Way" without the actual lyrics -- likely because he couldn't remember them! Salute the victors of the war on Terror to Queen's "We Are the Champions," then watch Dubya take that last wave as he leaves the White House to the sounds of SKKKKKYYYYNNNNAAARD as he tells you that he's a free bird now and "He can't change!"
Lord help, Bush! He can't change! He can't chaaayy-yyyiiee-ange! And remember, as Tupac would say, only God can judge him now! (Thanks to my buddies Negro Intellectual and Adeshola for the help and idea!)
Do you know any songs Georgie Porgy and the crew will be bumping on their way out? Make your recommendations in the comments below!
15 comments:
Geto Boys: Feels Good To Be A Gangsta.
This is brilliant! May I suggest adding "Blame It On Cain" by Elvis Costello?
Haha, I think "Hero" by Mariah Carey is one Bush sings himself to sleep to every night. At the very least it provided his inspiration for the farewell address!! After all, "good" and "evil" are facts and he is a champion of "good" values. And thank goodness he nipped that whole financial crisis thing in the bud with his clever fast acting bailout... Woo, glad we dodged that bullet!!
why so angry... You won..
"No one on the corner has swagger like us Hit me on my Burner prepaid wireless
We pack and deliver like UPS trucks...
Already going hell just pumping that gas Third world democracy
Yeah, I got more records than the K.G.B. So, uh, no funny business"
M.I.A. paper planes
anonymous 2:14 a.m.: Um. This is mocking. I think you're confusing humor with anger. (Humor is one slightly nicer way to deal with what has been a very horrid eight years that many people will have to live with for the rest of their lives. No election is going to cure traumatized and injured soldiers or the woes that still plague post-Katrina New Orleans. All that will still be fucked up after Jan. 20 -- as will the economy. So truly angry people do have the right to still go nuts on the whole Team Bush if they'd like. They'll have to live with his decisions for decades or more. I mean, people are still bitching about FDR and the man was elected five times).
If you'd like angry may I suggest HuffPo, DailyKos, MyDD, Salon or anything written or said by Chris Matthews in the last few days? That, my friend, that is angry. This features The Scorpions "Rock You Like A Hurricane." Silly would be much more appropriate.
"Rock You Like A Hurricane" I forgot how much I love that song...This lineup has now become the playlist at work.
Lol, brilliant. yet so very true!
How about Public Enemy's "I can't do nothing for you man" and "911 is a joke"
ZombieLace: I actually decided to go with a similar "Hero" song, but one where the "hero" is singing it from his POV. That would be that nightmare ballad by one Enrique Igelsias.
ScoobySnacks: Ooo! Those are good ones. Especially "I Can't Do Nothing For You Man." Might have to add that one.
Snob, I enjoyed this piece completely. Standing ovation. You have mastered compositional jousting. If I could teach my students how to speak with their voices through writing, I would retire from teaching a very happy woman.
researchbuff: Thank you!
Snob:
Is there anything else you would like to blame Bush for?
Scott: Nope! I'm good for now! Thanks for asking.
My Goodness, what a "lady!" I feel sorry for you...such anger will only harm you, get over the Bush thing, we have Obama to worry about now!
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