Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Randomness: Playing Cops N' Carjackers

When I was seven I enjoyed playing with "My Little Pony," Little People and Barbie Dolls. (I also enjoyed "Miss Mary Mack" and being bossy.) But it never occurred to my sisters or myself to act out scenes from "Grand Theft Auto." (Tip courtesy of Snob Reader Desiree)

That said, since I was so busy saying "ya know" ten-thousand times in my NPR debut, I'm going to take a breather and update the site midday tomorrow. Feel free to debate amongst yourselves about whether or not the press will continue to live fat off of Rev. Jeremiah Wright footage.)

The Snob on NPR!

Be wowed by my insights and opinions (and I hope I sound O-Tay!) Here's the link to my NPR appearance. I hope it won't be my last.

And here's a description of what we chatted about:

News & Notes , April 30, 2008 · Some political minds are wondering if Barack Obama's campaign staff has enough color. Plus, actor Wesley Snipes gets ready for his prison stripes. We've got that and more on today's bloggers roundtable. Joining in are Carmen Dixon of All About Race; Wayne Bennett of The Field Negro; and Danielle Belton of Black Snob.

PS. The little girl in the photo is the "Littlest Snob" in The Snob family, Baby Sis. She's taller now, but not by much.

Profiles In Sexy: Jill Marie Jones

I think if I could look like any actress it would be a toss up between earth child Lisa Bonet and No. 1 stunner Jill Marie Jones.

Bonet looks ethereal and mysterious. Jones is just fucking hot. I mean, seriously. Her face is flawless, classic hot black girl with luscious lips and big brown eyes. This was the kind of girl I saw and went, "I don't have a fucking chance." On top of that, she has a body worthy of the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders of which she was once a member. When I saw her on "Girlfriends" it was girl crush at first sight.

Of all the actresses (and characters) on "Girlfriends" Jill Marie Jones' Toni Childs was the greatest, sexiest, crazy person ever. She was narcissistic. She was a gold digger. She was manipulative. She was pathologically self-centered. On top of that she had the best comic timing on the show. She was the show, as far as I was concerned and I promptly stop watching it the minute she wasn't there any more. I mean, I like Persia White, Golden Brooks and Tracee Ellis Ross as much as the next person, but Jones as awesome and Toni was an iconic character, like Jasmine Guy's Whitley Gilbert. It was career defining.

I hope Jones will get more work and do better post-Girlfriends than Guy did post "A Different World." She's just too, too sexy, but that might also be her curse. She's not sexy in the way Gabrielle Union is crazy-cute adorable or in the way Sanaa Lathan and Kerry Washington are pretty, pretty BAPS. Jones is so hot she's at a Halle Berry level of mystifyingly sexy. I hate to say it, but sometimes I think the only reason why she's not taking off in her career is because Jones is not half-white and not light-skinned. Her sexy is her burden. She's too fierce to be the "best friend" in a flick, but Halle Berry isn't going to cede the two roles she gets a year to any newcomer.

God. Jill Marie. If you don't blow up that's a terrible waste of sexy.

For more of the Great Wall of Sexy check out the Great Wall of Sexy page on Flickr.

It's Like 'Where's Waldo?' For Black Campaign Staffers

I wrote this piece before Rev. Jeremiah Wright started speaking out publicly against his detractors, creating a media storm that lead to Barack Obama fully breaking from the man. This story is about Obama and is about race, but it could also be tied to the Wright drama as both are about Obama's relationship with black America and the impossible bind he is in to stay true to his roots while trying to be all things to all people.

Papa Snob has been playing this game with me for months now called "Spot the Black Person Working for the Obama Campaign." It's become an obsession. First it was just about Barack Obama's Secret Service detail that initially didn't always have a black officer embedded with him.

My father thought this was incredibly dumb, since Obama stood out so obviously with five white guys in suits surrounding him.

But things quickly shifted to staffers on the Obama campaign. While we regularly saw established black political surrogates backing him on TV and lots of black volunteers on the ground, my father was interested in paid staff, the political upstarts who gravitate to an political star's esteem to become the speech writers, the press secretaries, the policy wonks and the many other people who make up the Executive Branch.

Many politicians, black and white of both parties, have nourished black political talent from within, creating a launching pad stunning careers. From TV pundit Amy Holmes, a former speech writer for Senator Bill Frist to super Clinton fund raiser Ron Brown, appointed to be the Secretary of Commerce in the Clinton Administration. There are countless black politicians/activists have been mentors to young people, like Democrat Jesse Jackson and former US Congressman Bill Clay.

So my father was interested in the fact that when CBS News did a story on Obama's War Room, not unlike legendary War Rooms who launched James Carville and Karl Rove to infamy, there was nary a brown face in sight.

Unless you count Michelle Obama, in the video the majority of staffers were youngish white males, some older, ex-Clinton pugilists and some women, also white.

Papa Snob made the observation that while he realized Obama couldn't appear to be blacker-than-black in his quest for the nomination, he was a little disturbed that he's seen no black person, besides oracle of commerce Oprah Winfrey, show up as a integral part of his staff. He said if Obama can't afford to be too chummy with black people now, why is there any impression that he will be more sympathetic than past presidents. And traditionally the members of his War Room now, will make up his war chest in Washington.

Papa Snob is even more pragmatic and less prone to flights of fancy than myself and thinks black people are being a little deluded if they think Obama is going to devote much time to black issues in his administration. And he found this particularly galling since everything in Obama's background before now demonstrated he was deeply involved in and committed to black people.

My take? Obama does have some black senior staffers (including Cornell Belcher, Cassandra Butts and Eureka Gilkey), but they aren't as widely known or as omnipresent in the media. But I think there is a larger issue at play. How far will the right, the media and detractors on push Obama until he goes a Sister Soulja too far. As an optimist, I want to disagree with him, but as a pragmatist, I think he's on to something. I always thought it would be difficult for Obama to tackle "black" issues head on, lest the press and the Republicans start race baiting or worse, start pushing for a tougher stance on controversial issues like Affirmative Action, accusing any Negro who comes within 300 yards of Barack of being an unqualified, "Kill Whitey" hire.

I think Barack will be able to shape some issues as being broader than blackness, like poverty. But some things, like our abysmal public education system and health issues, have a definite black and brown component.

So, is my dad right?

Do you think Barack is going to give us the cold shoulder if he makes it to the White House? And if my dad is wrong about Barack's staff, I'd love to tell him the names of paid staffers who are black who are playing a major role in his campaign. So feel free to let me know below. I'm not quite sure how to get "Obama black staffer" out of the Google.

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

"Chicken Roost" Gate Continues!

This is what happens when your chickens get out of the gate, have a night on the town getting wasted and come home to throw up in the unsuspecting laps of innocent bystanders.

At the Howard University School of Divinity Tuesday, Barbara Reynolds, head of the National Press Club speaker's committee, responds to allegations that she invited Rev. Jeremiah Wright to speak before the club with an ulterior motive to harm Sen. Barack Obama's campaign. (Hamil Harris / The Washington Post)

From the Washington Post's "On The Trail" blog (Also from Snob reader Carl Walker, who has been all over this, as I have been too busy contemplating the sexual subtexts of Subway commercials and grieving over why I couldn't be at Coachella with Prince. It makes me want to cry every time I think about it too hard. Why? Why didn't I just blow my meager savings and go? It's like having a chance to risk it all on love. Instead I settled to stay put with my money. And can you sing "Purple Rain" money? CAN YOU??? Sure, I'd be broke but I'd have my purple memories. I'm sorry. I ... I have to lie down now.)

I'm A Creep (for Prince). UPDATE

UPDATE: The Purple Cops at YouTube have taken down the video that I initially had up of Prince's performance of Radiohead's "Creep" from Coachella. Fortunately I downloaded a copy for personal use. Until then, please settle for this review of the show by the Associated Press that made me wish I was still in California blowing insane amounts of money for a chance a Prince-phoria. (It's all high. No come down.) I hope the Purple Cops showed up because they want to sell a DVD of this performance that I am so FREAKIN' SAD about missing.

Prince, if you really love me. You'll put your performance of Radiohead's "Creep" at Coachella April 27th onto a CD/DVD/Dear God, ANYTHING so I can plunk down whatever you see fit to charge so I can own it.

I don't know how you fellow Snobs feel about Prince, but I, quite famously, went to every performance he gave in California four years ago during his Musicology Tour.

Mind you. I went into debt because I always bought two tickets as I was obsessed with turning people on to Prince. But I can't help it. I'm a Prince fan. It's both a blessing and a curse.

I usual don't demonstrate my insane degree of Prince-phillia as unlike my TJ fetish it DOES border on creepy, but it's a happy, Black Snob brand of creepy! Not put your pet rabbit in a microwave creepy.

Hence why I need this Radiohead cover in my life. To paraphrase the 90s grunge-era lyrics of the British band, I am a creep (for Prince.) I am a weirdo (for Prince.) I wish I was special (like Prince.) He's so fucking special.

I just don't care if anyone thinks he's weird. Your loss, man! More Prince for me!

Prince is my drug of choice (next to Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, B-boys and Grey's Anatomy) and for a brief experience while watching and listening to this grainy Coachella video I caught a contact high that turned to a brief dash of euphoria, the same kind I had at all of those concerts.

If I could grind Prince up I would have snorted him away years ago and I'd be in Prince-rehab Prince-jonesing for some Prince-brand methadone.

What would Prince Methadone be? Lenny Kravitz (who I also like), Terence Trent D'Arby (Who I like more than Kravitz but not as much as Prince) or Michael Jackson?

And would that be 80s Michael Jackson methadone? Because I don't want anything post the Dangerous Album.

I'm going to keep it real here--I would stalk Prince in real life if hundreds of other Purple fanatics hadn't beat me to the punch. And I feel so ripped off being born in '77 instead of '64 because then I would have been old enough to stalk a much more accessible Prince during the bulk of his late 70s-80s hey day. Sharing eyeliner and wearing matching outfits. I would have been that girl in lace, fingers-out gloves and fishnets as Vanity never would have had the privilege of being fucked up by His Royal Badness because I would have been, "No, bitch. ME FIRST."

And I can actually fucking sing. Unlike Vanity. Appolonia. Martika. Carmen Elecrtra. Countless other bitches who Prince was screwing who couldn't sing.

Sigh. We'll always have Fresno, Mr. Nelson.

The Chickens Came Home With A C-O-N-spiracy?!?!?!

Down thread of my "Obama's Chickens Coming Home to Say They Have Nothing to Apologize For" post Carl Walker chimed in with this link, hinting at a possible C-O-N-spiracy in Rev. Wright's gawd awful timing.

From the Daily News' Errol Lewis:

Shortly before he rose to deliver his rambling, angry, sarcastic remarks at the National Press Club Monday, Wright sat next to, and chatted with, Barbara Reynolds.

A former editorial board member at USA Today, she runs something called Reynolds News Services and teaches ministry at the Howard University School of Divinity. (She is an ordained minister).

It also turns out that Reynolds - introduced Monday as a member of the National Press Club "who organized" the event - is an enthusiastic Hillary Clinton supporter.

I'm not big on conspiracy theories of any kind. If anything this was probably a "one-woman" conspiracy where she may have seen a chance to stir the pot, but everyone from FOX News to the NAACP wanted to get a piece of Wright as any interview, speech or letter of correspondence would be a big coup.

I don't know if Reynolds' eagerness to help Wright stage a disastrous news conference with the national media was a way of trying to help Clinton - my queries to Reynolds by phone and e-mail weren't returned yesterday - but it's safe to say she didn't see any conflict between promoting Wright and supporting Clinton.

And the timing could have worst. He could have popped his head up to pepper people with black "truthiness" just before the election in Pennsylvania. Of course he's just in time to fuck shit up in Indiana and North Carolina. So, go nuts conspiracy hounds. But if you ask me, the culprit of all conspiracies is Ms. Scarlett in the living room with the candlestick.

Pop Culture: Five Dollar Foot Longs

Maybe it's just me, but does this commercial have a ring of slightly quirky, sexually perverse subversiveness to it? I mean, I know Prince gave me this "Dirty Mind" so I just have to live with it, but something just isn't right here. The song is sort of inane and hypnotic, like a They Might Be Giants or Stereolab track and the imagery is day-dreamingly pleasant (yet disturbing), but all these people doing the five finger salute followed by holding their hands at the approximation of 12 inches is just odd to me.

I'm not going to lie ... It made me think of penises.

Is it just me or did anyone else go, "Man, I can't go to Subway. They are serving up dick sandwiches." I don't mean to be crass. I'm just trying to keep it real, you know?

Subway commercial + calming, pseudo "Male enhancement" commercial music = monster penises. That's all I'm saying.

We'll Burn That Bridge When Get There ... And Now We're There, Part II

More Rev. Wright denouncing by Obama courtesy of MSNBC. (Thanks, Izzy)

We'll Burn That Bridge When Get There ... And Now We're There, Part I

Jon Stewart can't get enough of that Rev. Wright. Neither can the news networks. What's Obama to do when the souls of black folk keep popping up like skeletons in his closet?

Barack Obama just wrapped up a press conference trying to deal with his former pastor Rev. Jeremiah Wright, Jr. "napalm of truth" that set the bridge of obfuscation separating the two a flame. Radio talker Roland Martin is all over how Wright's speechifying, which was often flippant and in flagrance of polite Negrotude. Obama, again, claimed that this "Fuck You, America" was new-to-him. I still don't see Obama getting away with that excuse, but Wright didn't do his former ace no kind of help as his performance was long on ego and short on humility.

I said yesterday that Wright has nothing to apologize for. This was all about Wright trying to redefine himself in light of attacks on his character. But I knew the press and lots of other people would not get that "Obama and Wright are two different people" memo.

This press conference, where he could finally make a precise split from Wright, Obama claimed that this was not the man he once knew and respected.

I was entertained by Wright's negrotude but at the same time I cringed through his Press Club performance as I knew this was not going to come off in a "politically correct" manner. Mostly because he has broken the "11th Commandment" of the covenant between black Americans and Obama = don't fuck this up.

There are lots of black Americans who think Rev. Wright did and said nothing wrong. There are lots of black people who think like Rev. Wright. And now Rev. Wright has hiked up his pants and done the mash potatoes up and down that that napalmed bridge, leaving Obama with few options. It was finally time to throw Rev. Wright from the train. But, in fairness, Wright tossed Obama off first by saying Obama was a politician who had to do what politicians do, implying that the bitterness was long brewing.

But Obama has two problems:

1) He bellied up to Wright's bar long ago when he was trying to define and discover his blackness. They became friends and the minister went on to marry him and Michelle and Baptize their children. In Obama's books he speaks glowingly of him and up until recently, Obama used his church every chance he could get to stave off "secret Muslim" hate-talk from the right.

2) A lot of black people like Wright and share his views. Is he shoving a plurality of black Americas off that train with Wright?

Everyone thinks this is a about white media and white voters and it is to a degree, but just like Hillary's dying from the lack of black voters on her side, Obama can't distance himself from blackness. Not so long ago black voters went from lukewarm to red hot in their devotion of him. This was after nearly a year of black people giving him the side-eye. He has to burn a bridge with Wright that blow sparks down stream and set the whole city on fire. He can't afford to bewilder and upset his bridge to black Americans at the same time.

He can't take the black vote for granted.

Different versions of Obama's "blackness test" are happening every day. In regard to recent acquittal of three police officers in the shooting of Sean Bell, Obama made statements calling for peace and orderliness, raising the ire of Rev. Al Sharpton saying Obama was playing into the media's riot lust.

Barack Obama made a call for nonviolence in the aftermath of the Sean Bell verdict - infuriating the Rev. Al Sharpton, who accused the presidential candidate of trying to "grandstand in front of white people," sources told The Post.

During what a source described as a "heated" phone call yesterday, Sharpton told Obama he was disappointed with the Illinois senator's words on Friday, when Obama said "resorting to violence to express displeasure" was "completely unacceptable and counterproductive."

"[Obama] issues this statement and not a single rock had been thrown," said a source. "How does the candidate of change ask people to accept a verdict that is unjust?"

The source said Sharpton had hoped Obama would "side with the Bell family" and not use it as an "opportunity to grandstand in front of white people."

And this is not going to stop.

I have a larger column that I waiting later in the week to run, but I may run it tomorrow on another troubling factor in Obama's efforts to be all things to all people. It's about the damaging side effect of Obama running for president. He can not whole-heartedly embrace blackness in the same way white Democrats and other black politicians can. There are too many people in the press and too many white Americans who do not understand the complexities of black America, or do not care to know.

Basically, Bill Clinton could embrace Rev. Wright years ago and no one would bat an eye, but if Obama makes the same embrace he's been touched by a leaper of America's past sins.

I'm Throwing "Under the Bus" Under the Bus

While watching "Hardball" last night the cliche speedometer on the idiomatic phrase "Under the Bus" officially hit 5 million so I feel I can no longer use the phrase in good conscious due to the sheer laziness surrounding its overuse.

But I need something to describe that "throw ___ under the bus" feeling so, what euphemism can I start using in it's place?

Any ideas? I'm going to toss out a few at random. Please feel free to add yours. Which ever is the coolest I will start using. If you find me typing "under the bus" instead of our new catchphrase, please let me know that I've fallen off the hackneyed wagon.

Replacements for "Under the Bus," por ejemplo:

A) Into the wood chipper (a nod to "Fargo")

B) Off the monorail (a nod to an episode of "The Simpsons")

C) Into the meat-grinder

D) Shot in the face

E) Throat-throttled

F) Put the mace to the face

G) Belichicked (I was trying to think of sports analogies, this doesn't work but maybe someone thinks differently)

H) Into the rudder

I) Into the turbine

J) Pulled a Drive-by

K) Shoved into the Subway

L) Pushed onto the tracks

M) Bum-rolled

N) "went all Steve Seagal"

Anyone got anything better? It's got to be better than "under the bus" otherwise I'll backslide and go back to using it again, and I don't want to be lazy like that Chris Matthews.

Monday, April 28, 2008

NPR's News and Notes with The Snob!

I, Danielle Belton aka "The Snob," will be NPR News and Notes with Farai Chideya (and some other black bloggers) April 30th, this Wednesday, 7 p.m. central standard time. Enjoy my deep dulcet-rich, radio-friendly tones as channeled through a very loud black woman and a nondescript, Midwestern flavored accent smothered liberally in a non-sexy layering of suburban white guy who says "dude" a lot. And I will try not to say "dude."

But I promise nothing.

I'll be on during a 15 minute roundtable discussion. I don't know where those fifteen minutes will fall in the hour long show as ... ahem ... I've never listened to it before.

Hopefully there will not be a pop quiz.

PS. You can listen to News and Notes on the web, so please, feel free to listen to me speak from my diaphragm at your leisure.

Are Obama's Chickens Coming Home to Say They Have Nothing to Apologize For?

Rev. Jeremiah A. Wright Jr., pastor of Chicago's Trinity United Church of Christ and former pastor of Democratic presidential hopeful Sen. Barack Obama, D-Ill., addresses a breakfast gathering at the National Press Club in Washington, Monday, April 28, 2008.
(AP Photo/J. Scott Applewhite)


I checked out Rev. Jeremiah Wright's Hallelujah strut in Amen Corner of the NAACP convention. He's been making the rounds after an interview with Bill Moyers followed by at a press conference today and another speech to the press club today. And as fascinating as I found the guy, I didn't think he helped his ace Barack Obama at all. Mostly because Wright, who's not running for president, was himself in full, unrepentant, proud, defiant, resilient, brilliant and glib, charging that his critics were misguided, miseducated and misinformed.

He was practically basking in the glow of making the white folk uncomfortable.

As I was born a black person, nothing Wright has said is new to me. He doesn't sound any different from the Dr. Jawanza Kunjufu books I read as a child, given to me by my mother. It didn't sound any different from the Malcolm X speeches I studied. And not any different from the speeches of Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr. if you weren't solo worshiping the end of the "I Have A Dream" speech.

I've been inoculated from such blushing surprise. A black man? Complaining about America? I think I got the vapors! But for individuals who never take a stroll in black America, Rev. Jeremiah Wright's "Fuck You" Tour is not going to set well with those looking for apologies and pleasant, grinning pretensions.

Now I don't think Wright ever had anything to apologize for. It was his opinion. He is not a public figure. And most people outside of Chicago wouldn't even know he existed if he had not been the pastor who Baptized the Great Hope Mongerer and his daughters. But this "anti-charm" offensive (or regular charm offensive if you are a like-minded black person), only stoked the fires that Wright was always this colorful in his preaching and Obama's claim that he'd never heard Wright's more incendiary words is false.

I always thought that was a major flub when Obama claimed he never heard Wright speak this way (which evolved some when he gave his "race" speech). I don't even think Bill Clinton could have squared that circle and he professionally lies to people on a daily basis. Of course Clinton, covered in the friendly pall of whiteness could have Rev. Wright's love child and still get a pass. Obama is daily being taunted by the press and the opposition to throw black America, and all its complexities and inconveniences, under the bus.

Soon he'll be apologizing for everything from Body Count's/Ice T's "Cop Killa" record to Barry Bonds to Nat Turner's Rebellion. Forced to deny all of us in his bid for the White House, the same community he worked so hard to become a part of.

This is your cross to bear when you run as the post-racial candidate. Especially when no one else is post-racial. Sounds like everyone else is just old fashioned racial, arguing for Obama to pull a King Solomon and split the half-black baby.

So how should Obama handle the fall out of Wright's "I'm Grown and I Say What the Hell I Want To Say" victory lap? And how many denials does Obama have to do here before he heads into "Peter" territory? When do you cross the post-racial Rubicon, where you can't go back to tidy up all these fuzzy edges and clear the nuanced gray haze that no one likes in a black or white world?

Someone Fix TJ Holmes a meal ...

I'd do it, but I'm not in Atlanta, Ga.

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Video from All Things CNN

Sidenote: He must work out like a fiend if he really eats out that often because I used to go to town in restaurants in the Bako and it did not bode well for my waistline. I don't care what the brothers say. There is a such at thing as too. Much. Ass.

Incognegro: Wentworth IS "Gay by Association!"

I normally don't get involved in gay speculation, but as I noted in my Incognegro entry on Wentworth Miller, he has an insane gay following and an insane female following and they are constantly involved in trench warfare over which tribe can claim this quiet, unassuming, Ivy-league educated, not-black-black-person.

Personally, I've already claimed him as a secret Negro in the "Racial Draft," so, um, don't care! Because if he's gay he's still an INCOGNEGRO and that's all that matters to me.

But, obviously, the gays and the fan girls feel differently.

Wet For Went, a Miller fan who makes my mild curiosity look like a severe case of Went-aphilla, pokes fun at the whole notion that if your gay friend comes out of the closet somehow you are now gay. (And the gay friend would be Luke McFarlane of "Brothers and Sisters" who recently came out and was rumored to be dating Miller after they were repeatedly seen making Starbucks runs together.)

Sayeth Jossip:

Who does our heart go out to? Publicist Jill Fritzo at PMK, who’s going to have to handle another round of gay denials for client Wentworth Miller.

Thanks to Brothers & Sisters actor Luke MacFarlane (who plays Scotty, a gay character) coming out in an interview, the gossips will inevitably start marching through the actor’s paparazzi shots to see who he’s been linked to.

Read more gay speculating here and women unrepentant in his love of all things vagina related.

If the gays and the fan girls can't work this out, I fear Jimmy Carter will need to be flown in to broker some sort of peace agreement where the gays get Miller on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays and the breeders get him Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays with Saturday ownership rights alternating weekly.

But I already called "Negro!" So back off you white, Lebanese, whatever the fuck else Wentworth is people. We need all the Princeton grads we can get!

On top of that FOX has decided to torture me with another season of "Prison Break." Why??? Season three was nightmarishly bad, but I'll still watch four anyway because Wentworth's fickle ass won't make a movie.

C'mon! I know you're getting offered roles. Take something! "Prison Break" has turned into a self-parody where none of the characters make sense anymore.

And if you do accept a script could it be sci-fi or another flick where you play another incognegro? And can your romantic lead be a black or not-black-black-actress? I still have dreams.

And those dreams include you getting it on with Jada Pinkett-Smith, Kerry Washington, Paula Patton or Nicole Lyn? I'll let you pick!

Angela Bassett Job Watch

My favorite sporadically employed actress has landed herself an new gig.

According to ComingSoon.net, Angela Bassett will be joining the cast of "ER."

Angela Bassett will join the cast of the Emmy-winning medical drama "ER" as a regular next season.

Bassett will play a tough attending with a troubled past who's coming back to Chicago after a few years in Indonesia doing tsunami relief. Her arrival in the second episode next season promises to shake County General's ER to the core.

"Angela is a wonderfully talented actress whom I've long hoped to work with," said "ER" executive producer John Wells.

I don't watch "ER" and I never have and I likely never will (even with Angela on it), but I like it when Angela holds down a check. Granted, this is (of course) the last season of "ER," but why not go out with some Angela "Git Yo' Shit" Bassett in there?

Sunday, April 27, 2008

More Fashionable Fun With Michelle Obama

And she's from the South Side, so don't tempt her. (To see full size of image, click here.)

And why did Klymaxx's hit "Meeting In the Ladies Room" pop on in my head at the thought of that?**

You just don't know what me and Michelle Obama are talking about.

Seriously. You don't mess with the Midwest. (And feel free to rock these on your blogs or Web pages, just give me a shout-out or a little linkage when you post.)

Apologizes for why I haven't done one of these in a while. New pictures. New clothes. Same awesome Michelle.

Now for some this campaign is about Barack, but not me. It's always been about Michelle. She's the one I identify with, who sounds like my mother, aunts and friends. She ... what's the parlance? Keeps it real. I mean, if I wanted to see future first lady 1.0, I'd be blogging about that Fembot Nancy Reagan look Cindy McCain is rocking. And, let's face it, back when there were nine or fourteen or whatever how many Republicans still in the hunt she didn't even crack into my fav five.

Fred Thompson's wife was hot n' bitchy. Romney's one-n-only was the "Girl Next Door." Judith Giuliani was my favorite most likely to "go insane and kill someone" chick. Cindy is just meh. She's not even the coolest McCain. That designation belongs to his beyond ancient, Last Confederate Widow mom who, like all people of a certain age, just said whatever bigoted, "I hate Mormons" crap that came out of her mouth.

But all those crazy, kooky broads aren't good enough to hold Michelle's purse. But I'm tired of writin'. Let's look at the clothes!

In Pennsylvania, Michelle came out to press the flesh in a lovely green knit top. Nothing too crazy. Always classy. I like. I like.

Michelle whipped out her favorite belt as well. A little snake to spice up an otherwise bland khaki mix-in-match. But, once again. The hair is looking fabulous.

And I wish I could get a better shot of those shoes. They look interesting. Oh, well. Let's move on to what I thought was Michelle's most recent fashion TKO.

And the men all pause when she walks into the room!

Uh-Ooh-uh-uh-Ooh! This is an amazing dress. I loved the dark jewel tone and the display of leg was of such lethality that I was a little uncomfortable when Stephen Colbert began to uncomfortably hit on her in a comic bid to make Barack jealous. Plus, it pulled me into my usual of game of reading sexual innuendo into everything the candidates, their spouses and surrogates say.

Yes, we can, look for innuendo! Yes. We. Can!

It's just my personal game. I'm not sure if anyone else does this. I'm bored basically ... And ... I'll admit it ...

I have a dirty mind. Blame Prince.

**Oh, and for the uninitiated. Michelle n' Barry probably rocked it to this jam back in those crazy 80s. Man. I heart this video.

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Friday, April 25, 2008

Justice Seperate and Unequel

A scuffle breaks out after the announcement of the verdict in the Sean Bell case outside of the Queens County Criminal Courts Building Friday, April 25, 2008 in the Queens borough of New York. Three detectives were acquitted of all charges Friday in the 50-shot killing of the unarmed Bell on his wedding day, a case that put the NYPD at the center of another dispute involving allegations of excessive firepower. (AP Photo/Jason DeCrow)

If you weren't living under a rock this morning you heard about the acquittal of three NYPD officers in the death of Sean Bell. I won't go into incredible detail about the back story which consists of undercover officers investigating a strip club, a soon-to-be groom celebrating with friends, and depending on who you believe, a terrible melodrama involving a man going for a gun or three guys freaked out when men who didn't identify themselves as cops came at them with guns.

The real thing I want to say is that unless there are extremely egregious circumstances it is very hard to convict a cop for doing anything. Period. And that's ultimately the problem. Black people wouldn't so routinely distrust these sorts of verdicts if they weren't so common, and we're just talking about the stuff that actually makes it to the court room, not all the times police ignore people who need help, misunderstand people, give folks attitude or the runaround, who arrest people without cause, who taser 14-year-old girls and treat every black male over the age of 12 like a potential gang banger.

And this goes beyond race. I lived in Bakersfield for five years. Not only did the police get into "questionable" situations with blacks and Mexicans, they did it over and over with white people. Bakersfield was a "law and order" town where the only version of events that mattered were the ones recalled by the officers. It was the honor system all the way. There was no shooting the review board saw as unjustified.

How could anyone expect the victims to agree this was justice when everything is stacked against them? The cops are protected by the police department which works intimately with the prosecuting attorneys to fight crime, the prosecutors are backed up by the District Attorney, the DA is backed up by city and state government who help elect and appoint the judges, so who's on the victims side in this situation?

If they're lucky--a half decent attorney and some local activists. And that's when you're lucky. And that's no guarantee of justice.

To pretend like the judicial system is above ass-covering is incredibly naive. It's like expecting politicians not to steal. Or the government not to go to war under false pretenses. Or expecting multinational corporations to be honest when they say, "We had no idea China was covering those toys in lead. Or that Vioxx could kill you. Honest to God."

And too many of the public dismiss these incidents because they think it will never happen to them. People who immediately become converts when one of those bad eggs everyone in the system has been complicit in shielding opens up a can of excessive force on you. Like the female bartender pummeled by an off-duty Chicago officer. Or last year in St. Louis' metro east, a highway patrol officer going 126 miles per hour slammed his cruiser into a couple in a SUV and a car carrying two teenage sisters, massacring the girls. Also injured, he tried to pawn it off on an alleged driver who swerved in front of him.

He reportedly tried to cover his tracks by claiming he had his siren on, but the police cruiser, like a many across the country, was equipped to turn on an internal camera the minute the lights and sirens go up. His was, oddly, off while he was in "pursuit."

The lie worked for a while, but easily fell apart. He should go to jail, but one can never tell. Sometimes you're held to a higher standard for having the power of holding lives in your hands. Sometimes you're given a slight rap on the knuckles and told you'll lose your job, but little else.

You never know as it's hard to have faith in the system when it's the system you're fighting.

I've Been A Bad, Bad Journalist ... UPDATED! (oops!)

UPDATE: So, as it turns out there was some confusion in the Snob household since the CNN was showing clips about the Rev. Wright/Bill Moyers interview all day yesterday AND someone asked me at 8 p.m. if I was watching the Moyers interview I erroneously assumed it was on last night as I happily watched "Grey's Anatomy" instead of the news I thought was taking place.

My bad!

But I'm going to leave the rest of the post as-is because, who cares? You know? I've been wrong before. Anyway, "Grey's" was awesome even though I didn't understand why two medical interns could only afford the world's shittiest apartment. I once made $22,000 a year and I could afford a cockroach free, non-gross abode. But they're in Seattle, and the rent is high ... so I would still not live somewhere that crappy. There are suburbs, right? Can't live there and drive to work?

I totally watched "Grey's Anatomy" instead of Rev. Jeremiah Wright on Bill Moyers' last night.

I mean. I know Wall of Sexy member Isaiah Washington isn't on there anymore, so I can't even use him as an excuse, but ... there's been nothing worth watching but news and sports on TV in months. And I needed to watch "Grey's." It was like a mental colonic. It washed away the bad. Matter of fact, it felt so good to indulge in some TV pop fiction that I even watched "Lost" afterwards.

I got to hand it to "Lost," much like The Young and the Restless you can go years without watching that sucker and still get caught right up. Sure, I only understood about half of what was going on, but it's Lost. I could be watching it every week and still only get half of what's going on.

So I watch that at my leisure.

That said, did anyone watch Rev. Wright? CNN showed some snippets, but it's CNN. God, only knows what they left out.

Serena Williams IS the Hotness for Nike Women

video

Serena Williams was on hand to unveil Nike's 2008 Women's fall line Thursday in Venice, Calif. and she looked OUTSTANDING. I like it when my girl looks good. The hair was sleek and the curves were kickin'. Very, very nice.

Look at that sexy face! She's putting the hurt on 'em!

And here's a sample of the wares.

All art and video courtesy of WireImage.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Google Stalking TJ Holmes: CNN. Pictures. Gimme. Now.

This picture was taken by CNN of TJ while he was in Atlanta filming the last of the Black In America College Tour and was posted on the blog, All Things CNN.

While they manage to keep track of comedian Jon Stewart's Wolf Blitzer fetish they are not nearly as TJ-riffic as I require. The amount of TJ-formation was paltry. Where's the love, All Things CNN?

Also, a special request:

CNN has a special photographer who takes pictures of TJ Holmes sometimes??? Um ... does anyone know someone at CNN so I can contact them and be like, "Hook a sister up. I will do nothing BUT tell people how awesome my future husband is!"

I will be his Michelle Obama. Yes we can, TJ! (and CNN.)

It's that deep!

Don't just share with All Things CNN. They don't have the time to give the Reese's Peanut Butter Cup of TV News the attention he rightfully deserves.

Make it happen, CNN! We can do this!

For more pictures of TJ, please check out the archives on my flickr page. Remember! If you have a picture of TJ don't be a TJ hog. Some of us have NEEDS!

Thank you.

PS. Random note ... that All Things Anderson blog is kind of creepy. I mean, I love me some TJ, but there are so many stalker-ish Anderson Cooper blogs. And not of the Google/joke variety. I mean, All Things Anderson is the least pervy, but Coop-Oop-a-doop has real stalker problems. Us TJ lovers are just a bunch of slightly bored women (and gay dudes) who like news hotties. We would never get all weird on TJ on a dark street to the point that TJ has to pretend he's on his cell phone and cross to the other side.

Doug Wilder: It'll Be Rough But Obama's Got It (He Hopes)

This is the latest installment on my series looking at the opinions of prominent black Americans on Barack Obama's candidacy. The first time around I highlighted black conservatives. After an overwhelming response for more opinions from more people, I've decided to continue the series, widening the scope to political leaders, activists, authors, journalists and other influential individuals. These posts will run twice a week on The Black Snob and on Blacksnob's DailyKos journal.

I was originally going to kick-off the next phase of my "Critical Thought on Obama" series with former San Francisco Mayor Willie Brown, but when I saw a Bloomberg article on former Virgina Governor Douglas Wilder and his thoughts on Barack Obama's candidacy I decided to choose Wilder, another man who ventured on a historic first as the first black Governor since P.B.S. Pinchback held the distinction for 35 days in Louisiana during Reconstruction.

The grandson of slaves, Lawrence Douglas Wilder had the unlikely distinction of becoming governor of a southern state, specifically one that had once held the capital of the Confederacy. After winning the Democratic nomination in 1989, pollsters predicted that Wilder would win with as much as 10 percent of the vote, but Wilder barely squeaked through a victory with less than half a percentage point.

Some attributed the sudden closeness of the win to the "Bradley Effect," now dubbed the "Wilder Effect," which opines that white voters would say one thing to pollsters and do another at the polls.

After serving one-term due to a Virgina law that does not allow governors to serve consecutive terms, Wilder has entertained runs for senate and president, switched his political affiliation to "Independent," is currently the Mayor of Richmond, Va. and is backing Barack Obama for the Democratic presidential nomination.

While he is for Obama, Wilder has first-hand knowledge of what it is like to swim in uncharted waters. He remembers his wisp of a win after predictions of a windfall.

"He's struggling with them in terms of the nomination," Wilder said. "I don't think that struggle will emanate through the general election because they have far more in common with him than they do with the Republican candidate."

Still, he said, Obama should be prepared for a discrepancy between polling and election results ... Wilder predicted a tight race for Obama against the presumptive Republican presidential nominee, Arizona Senator John McCain, if Obama does win the nomination. He said he had advised the candidate on how to handle the race issue.

Wilder, like some other black politicians backing Obama, has praised Obama for his handling of "the race question" and thinks Obama should continue to take the "higher ground" and let the surrogates do the dirty work.

"Let the rest of us do what needed to be done" in responding to attacks (he said).

"I told him it's going to be very difficult, particularly running against a woman," he said. "And racially it's going to be even more difficult."

As per the biggest racial controversy Obama has had so far, Wilder admits that Obama has "been hurt" by comments made by Rev. Jeremiah Wright, but the ex-governor isn't too worried.

"(I)f that's all they got in the tank, we'll be going up for Obama's inauguration."

Republicans will see few gains from focusing on race, he said.

"They will do so at their own risk of damaging the Republican Party forever," he said, because "people are always ahead of leaders.''

I like Wilder and I respect his sage advice, but I can't say that I always share "Sun'll come out to'morrow" point-of-view that Obama's race speech settled things even remotely or that the bigots won't continue to ding the Rev. Wright bell until the white voters come home and vote for John McCain. As I type this Republicans are using Rev. Wright through Obama to tangentially attack random Democrats running for office.

Willie Horton was a smear and the Swift Boat drama was a fabrication, but this is a distortion with videotape. Poppy Bush didn't have video of Horton committing rape. There was no old film of Kerry preparing for his so-called "Band-Aid Purple Heart." But how does one put a mute button on "God damn, America" and FOX News braying about Obama sitting in Wright's church for decades?

One would think individuals will tire of it and ignore it, and I hope they do, but considering a minister recently put up "Obama, Osama Humm Are they brothers?" on his church sign, nothing that so easily appeals to our Lizard brains will die a short, violent death. These traumas will need to be triaged as long as Obama is in the race. The fact that two contradicting attack memes (one that Obama is a "secret" Muslim and the other that he is a "whitey-hating" black Christian fundamentalist) shows you do not need logic to push a lie. Mere truthiness is enough.

Also, if Wilder is arguing that Obama's surrogates need to take up the knee capping mantle, would he ready his mallet and commence with the wallops? It has been a continued criticism that Obama is in a "damned if you do, damned if you don't" bind where if he attacks Clinton too hard he'll be accused of going back on his promise of a "new kind of politics," but if he does nothing he risks accusations of being a milquetoast elitist who is all split and no banana.

Save for some sparse members of the chattering punditocracy, the heavy-hitters are largely sitting on their hands, whining about Clinton's gall for staying in the race, as if merely wishing her away would actually make her retire to her laurels.

So, while I like Wilder, admire him, he knows more than anyone how tough it is. He has been there and has proverbially done it, so I would suggest that he considering doing it again for Obama.

No one becomes history without first making their opponents history.

Is the "Cult of Hope" Hurting Obama?

Found this on the ol' AfroSpear today and thought it was very interesting. It's a post by D. Yobachi Boswell at BlackPerspective.net entitled "Obamanites Do Barack Candidacy A Big Disservice."

Here's a snippet:

It never fails that no matter how many missed opportunities go by Mr. Obama, and no matter how many head scratching mistakes he makes; no matter how big a continued strategy fails (see 10 point loss in Penn), the Obamanites never see one wrong thing that he is doing/has done.

... (H)e’s come up short time and again in a number of areas. It all primarily comes under the heading of not adjusting to the changing winds, i.e. he rest on those positive factors that I’ve highlighted and no matter the circumstance will hardly adjust to meet new developing challenges. ...

Obamanites will have none of this talk though. A one to three percent shrinking lead is a massive success to them. Going into June having eeked out a bare minimum win to them is evidence of perfection, though he’s had opportunity to bury his opponent; yet instead has allowed her to define him to the public and raise his negatives going into the general.

They resist any critique of him, including constructive criticism by Obama supporters who haven’t drunk the kool-aid and are not enthralled with the man’s perfection. This is an unfortunate constant in our public discourse, where if certain people are for someone then they refuse to acknowledge any negatives about them. They can’t be for someone and be critical of them at the same time. They find that to somehow be mutually exclusive, rather than nobly honest and constructive.

Boswell makes some interesting points. I've jokingly written about some of Obama's more fervent supporters who have a bit of a Messiah complex over him, but I haven't looked at how some of the "hear no evil, see no evil" types could be impacting the race.

It concerns me that Obama is having trouble adjusting to the Clintons' tenacity. He's the front runner. Mathematically Hillary Clinton cannot win, yet she's still in it and winning states. The following is an extreme example, but this is almost like when Mike Huckabee was winning states when it was obvious he couldn't win the nomination. Huckabee was more of a long-shot. Sen. Clinton has actually won many more delegates and states than the Huckster, but shouldn't she be marginalized by now? Why are we still existing in this limbo where her chances at grasping the nomination is still a possibility?

Where is the coup de grâce, Barack?

Last night on CNN they showed a statistic that said a plurality of Pennsylvanians thought Obama would be the nominee, yet Clinton won the state by almost 10 percent. That means a lot of people voted for her even though they thought the contest was over. What does that say? What is that really about? It's uncomfortable for people to talk about it, but I'm just going to throw it out there.

Are lower-to-working class whites going to vote for Obama? You know, the less erudite, non-Liberal and not wealthy white voter? The class that is less likely to "hope" and more likely to go "I'm voting for McCain if he's the nominee?" What is Obama to do about those people as a good portion of the Democratic electorate are them and are impervious to grand displays of superlatives and loquaciousness in the midst of a presidential primary run?

What can Obama do to convince these individuals that he's for them too and keep them from staying at home or breaking ranks come November?

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

I'm going to be on NPR, fellow Snobs!

The good folks at National Public Radio found my blog and invited yours truly to be a guest on NPR's News and Notes.

I know! It's crazy, right? Well, if all goes according to plan I'll be on the air with some other black bloggers April 30th. You'll get to hear my famously deep voice. It's not Barry White deep. It's more, "I could do voice overs" deep. But you can be the judge of that.

I'll keep you updated.

Stay Snobby!

So the bigots WERE right, Harold Ford Jr.!

You DID tell that woman to call you!

As Harold Ford Jr. preps for his upcoming marriage to Emily Threlkeld, he may want to also be thinking about how to appease some black voters in his home state of Tennesse — if, that is, he ultimately wants to be elected as governor there, as insiders have said.

In reaction to his proposal last month, several African-American voters have been asking in various Internet forums why he didn’t choose a black mate.

“Why is he doing this to his people?” one woman who claimed to have dated him in the past has asked Big Head DC. “I am hurt, and we should all be angry.”

Lawd, when Snob reader Kimberley sent me this nugget all I could do was laugh. I'm not one who thinks every interracial relationship is a personal rebuke of me, because, um ... it's not about me. But still, this is HILARIOUS! Naturally some people are pissed, but the IRONY!

Some of you may recall the attack ad that made Ford look like a white woman chasing playboy. Does he owe the RNC an apology now? I mean, the bigots probably would appreciate their apology considering the razzing they got for that moronic ad.

But oh wait? You lost your senate bid. Never mind.

What I Like About You ...

Is that you read my blog ... and you leave comments ... and that you are all awesome!

Yes. That is Arnold giving you the one-thumb salute at the end of "Terminator 2: Judgment Day." Yes. I'm a geek for Sci-Fi. I'm not ashamed.

That out of the blogs in the blog-o-verse you decided to Google/Stumble/Blogroll your way onto mine. That said, here are some things you can look forward to in the coming few weeks on "The Black Snob":

New feature "Dereliction of Duty": Due to the overwhelming response to post on black Greek life, I started talking and writing with others about how so many of our long standing institutions meant to help black people seem to be stagnate, inadequate or worse, derelict of duty. I hope this will be a weekly feature based on items as they come up in the news as well as profiles on these institutions and their original purpose. I will give my take on why these groups were once great, where they went wrong and how they can be relevant again.

Some examples of who (or what) I'll be writing about include: The NAACP, historically black colleges and higher learning institutions, the Congressional Black Caucus, the National Council of Negro Women, the Pan-Hellenic Council, 100 Black Men of America groups, various politicians, integration, the public school system and many others. Feel free to suggest a group, project or individual you think needs a reality check. Drop me an email or post your suggestion below.

More Incognegro: Who knew people liked to talk about not-black-black-people as much as I do? Incognegro is going to become a weekly feature that not only profiles the racially ambiguous among us, but also reports on Incognegroes in the news (celebrity, local or otherwise). A profile or news feature will run on Mondays.

Upcoming profiles to look forward to include: Unemployed Actor Vin Diesel, Ex-Wrestler turned Actor Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson and CNN reporter Soledad O'Brien. If there is someone in the public eye you'd like see profiled in "Incognegro," please, drop a Snob an email.

More "Sexy" people: Starting next Wednesday, I will profile an individual from my "Great Wall of Sexy," currently under construction on Flickr. These will be every Wednesday and I promise to keep them short, sweet and sexy. You can submit your names of sexy people of every ethnicity, color, occupation, age, gender, sexual orientation, alive or dead to be added to the wall. Of course, you have to tell me WHY this person is sexy. Looks alone (while important) will not get you on the wall.

More Snob art: It might take me awhile to get this up and running, but I may revive my old cartoon strip "Nerd Girl" on The Black Snob. (Pictured on the left is the main character's best friend Rebecca.) I started the comic back in high school when it was called "Hazelwood Central," after my alma mater. It was changed to "Nerd Girl" after I revived it in California with the intention of publishing it (after some words of encouragement from cartoonist Keith Knight of "The K Chronicles." I will write about the crazy weekend I met him another day.) But it got lost in the shuffle. So I don't know when it will make its official comeback, but I will keep you posted.

More Critical Thought on Obama: After the success of the last series people were crying out for more, so I'll give you more! Unlike last time the entries will be more spread out, not daily, like before. I'm trying to reduce the level of burnout and up the quality of the posts. But here is the list as it stands today. (You can still e-mail me for suggestions or people you want to read about.)

Former Mayor of San Francisco Willie Brown

NAACP leader Julian Bond

DLC leader Harold Ford Jr.

Rep. John Conyers

Author/TV Host Tony Brown

Rep. Maxine Waters

Rep. Charles Rangel

Former Ambassador Andrew Young

TV Host Tavis Smiley

Rep. John Lewis

Rep. William Lacy Clay

Academic/Author Cornell West

BET founder Robert Johnson

Author/Activist Kevin Powell

Author/feminist Bell Hooks

Author Michael Eric Dyson

Former Poet Laureate Maya Angelou

Author Toni Morrison

Washington Post columnist Eugene Washington

Chicago Newspaper columnist Clarence Page

Democratic strategist Donna Brazille

Washington Post editorial writer Jonathan Capehart

The articles will run every Tuesday and Thursday beginning tomorrow with ex-Mayor Willie Brown. If you don't see your favorite media/political/activist/author/guru on the list, please continue to submit names. Keep in mind, some of these individuals may not be written up due to what I can or can't find via the internet and the library.

That is all! Stay snobby!