Barf over the schmoopy, schlupy, coochi, coochi, coo talk in People Magazine:
"We really do feel we are soulmates." That's schmoopy newlywed Mariah Carey, who does her best to jinx her impromptu union to Nick Cannon in the pages of People, which scored the exclusive snaps of their not-a-joke April 30 knot-tying in the Bahamas.
"I never felt a love like this was in the cards for me," sighs the big-lunged chanteuse, 39, who donned a slinky white wedding dress from Nile Cmylo, Christian Louboutin heels and a dinner napkin-like veil for the secret sunset nuptials at her sumptuous island estate.
"She is beautiful on the outside and 10 times as beautiful on the inside," swoons her dewy if unoriginal groom, 27, who also sported white for the ceremony.
It was apparently "love at first sight" for the actor, who decided he and the body-conscious songbird should stick together until death following six long weeks of coupledom (and a prominent role in her "Bye, Bye" video).
Um ... I'm happy for you? Congratulations? Why are you together again? And six weeks, huh? Just six weeks from fling to ring? Well, you've already lasted longer in wedded bliss than Eddie Murphy and Tracie Edmonds so ... I give it a few months, maybe. But this is a lovingly well timed publicity stunt wedding ... it could work, right?
Mimi wants kids and even got a "Mrs. Cannon" tattoo (that always works out well) but she's keeping her one-good-sense-eye-open.
At least the impulsive Mimi may have taken precautions before her latest walk down the aisle (she previously wed music mogul Tommy Mottola in an extravagant, fairy tale-style affair in 1993).
FoxNews.com says, despite reports to the contrary, she did indeed have her far less famous hubby sign an agreement that makes it clear her many rainbow-covered charm bracelets and her expansive collection of stilettos and sausage-casing clothing is hers and hers alone.
"Anyone who thinks we didn't have a prenup is smoking something!" she purportedly told a pal.